Oh I fooled myself for a little while.
I dealt with the change in sleep. Oh how I already miss the straight 6-7 hours of sleep! I’ve started to adjust to being available to Malia whenever she needs me. I’ve started to develop a routine that works with baby girl.
And for a little while, I was still able to sneak in some reading time, some photography, blogging and general housework. Wow – not bad! I can be a mom and have a life?! Yeah!!
Then slam went my head into the brick wall….
It hit me hard this afternoon when Malia was particularly fussy and life was starting to settle back to it’s norm….you know, laundry really does have to be done, bills have to be paid (gotta love those medical bills that come through), and gosh darn it – I want and need to take a shower! WTH! I wasn’t even really tired today since Malia is sleeping better at night and feedings are regularly scheduled. But for the life of me, she couldn’t be comforted. She’s possibly going through a growth spurt because she ate more frequently today than she has in the last couple of weeks. And since I’m breast feeding exclusively, that left me tied down all day….occasionally checking messages one handed or holding up my Kindle (which froze on me today) to have a few minutes of ME time. But YOU try reading a book with a baby wailing in your arms. And dang, she likes to throw jabs like Manny Pacquiao!
…and that Super Woman exterior started to crack.
I felt like I was on the verge of tears all day. I wanted fresh air. I wanted adult interaction. I wanted to walk – maybe even do a few stretches just to get my blood flowing. And gosh darn it – I really wanted to go to the grocery store to buy some Drumstick ice cream cones. And at that point, I very nearly lost it. I looked down at her and gave her a kiss on the top of her head – loving her so completely…..but I really really wanted a drumstick – so bad!!!
I would have happily sent the husband out to get me those coveted treats, but I didn’t want the one adult around to leave me behind. LOL
…and I still need to take a shower.
Day is over….tomorrow will start afresh.
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